On the train to work this morning one of the doors is broken. If you push the button to open the door it just clicks and hisses at you like an irritated snake and refuses to budge.
How do I know this? Because at absolutely every bastard stop from King's Lynn to Cambridge some numpty, often several numpties, have pushed the door open button despite there being not one but two signs on the door with a pictogram depicting a train door with a big red line through it which even Slime Beasts of the Planet Zod could work out means "These doors are broken". Presumably it's this international wordless sign so we don't upset any uppity immigrants who would then sue for "distress and anxiety" because the train company didn't write "Out of Order" in their fucking language
OK so the brain dead trolls employed by National Distress East Anglia have stuck the signs on upside down but the meaning is still, I would posit, pretty clear.
Ah, another station, Whittlesford Parkway... Proper commuter belt now, maybe it was just the webbed fingered bog dwellers of the fens who are too dense to work out that when the sign says "Broken door" there is a fighting chance that said door won't open.
Click... Hisssssss... Click... Hisssssss....
Audley End maybe?
Click... Hisssssss... Click... Hisssssss....
Fucking hell I despair.
After Celebrating Twenty Years of Guido, Paul Staines Stands Down as Editor
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Dear Co-conspirators,
On Wednesday night co-conspirators, friends, politicians and the best of
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2 comments:
Give a passenger a button, any button and they will press it. We ALWAYS ignore the toilet alarm on coaches because the muppets think it is the hand wash button. However the same people will not press the floor pedal on a Caetano Levante or pull the lever on a Jonkheere Mistra to flush the toilet.
There is a blog running about problems on National Express East Anglia that may be of interest to you.
Good blog!
Yes the 90% on time made me laugh in a sort of bitter, ironic way. Can't run the trains on time, just redefine "late". I reckon that my train gets in within a minute of advertised time about 1 time in 20.
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