Prejudiced... we haven't even started yet

So Tory token mussie and all round gobshite Baroness Warsi has opened her flappy mouth and come up with this corker:

Prejudice against Muslims has "passed the dinner-table test" and become socially acceptable in the UK

Yes it has Baroness, and it's only going to get louder and louder and louder as the majority of British people get more and more pissed off at your co-religionist in the "religion of peace"^TM and your clamouring for special treatment, laws to protect your paedophile prophet from having nasty cartoons drawn about him, halal this and sharia the other. We are going to get more and more intolerant of you the more we discover about your antediluvian faith and its requirements and its inability to adapt and change.

In her speech, she is expected to say the description of Muslims as either moderate or extremist encourages false assumptions.

That's true enough. There's no such thing as a moderate muslim.

Baroness Warsi will say terror offences committed by a small number of Muslims should not be used to condemn all who follow Islam.

The fact that muslims are actively encouraged to hate us by their sacred texts and Saudi funded religious education brands us as immoral demons out to destroy their faith and thus leads directly to said terror offences obviously doesn't happen on Planet Warsi. Maybe she needs a little reminder of what the islamic terror manual known as the Koran actually says:

9:29 Fight against such of those who have been given the Scripture as believe not in Allah nor the last day, and forbid not that which Allah hath forbidden by His Messenger and follow not the religion of truth, until they pay the tribute readily, being brought low.

and how about

5:54 O ye who believe! take not the Jews and the Christians for your friends and protectors: They are but friends and protectors to each other. And he amongst you that turns to them (for friendship) is of them. Verily God guideth not a people unjust.

and there's plenty more where that comes from.

And just for good measure:

But she will also urge Muslim communities to be clearer about their rejection of those who resort to violent acts.

I thought we weren't supposed to differentiate between moderate and extreme mussies Warsi?

It's a chilly night. Better throw another Koran on the fire.

Anti Dhimmitude reqested

Now we all know that the government takes about as much notice of those online polls they host as they do for, well, any opinions expressed to them by the British public who by and large just want them to fuck off. However some fuckwad islamist has stuck a petition up to make Mohammed's (piss be upon him) birthday a UK national holiday.

Fortunately someone with an ounce of sense has launched a counter-petition which is here.

Of course the chances of a holiday on Big Mo's birthday happening are about the same as there being 72 virgins waiting to give me a blow job when I get to my office this morning but just to put the raghead's noses out of joint do go along and sign.

At the sound of the woman being stoned, Mecca Standard Time will be...

It's always hilarious when religious people try to use science to back up their claims to the existence of their particular brand of sky pixie but this is the first time I've seen the Muslims crawl out from under their rock only to make themselves look more backward than we thought they were in the first place.

Muslim scientists and clerics have called for the adoption of Mecca time to replace GMT, arguing that the Saudi city is the true centre of the Earth.

Right. Well if you were to cut out a model of the UK and find the place where that model would balance you find that its somewhere just outside Blackburn, Lancashire. However I don't see anyone proposing the town famous for having lots of holes and a really cheap shoe shop to be made capital of Great Britain.

So what piece of scientific wisdom have they come up with to bolster the claim of Mecca Standard Time?

One geologist argued that unlike other longitudes, Mecca's was in perfect alignment to magnetic north.

Errr.. where did this guy do his training. First thing they taught us when I did Geology (University of Lancaster, class of '86, I graduated Draco Cum Laude) was the Earth's magnetic poles move about and that "magnetic north" is different depending on where you are, it even flips round so north becomes south every so often. Ali Al Bottyburp, muslim scientist extraordinare, can't even claim that it lines up at Mecca because a quick shufty over at the US Geological Service shows that the magnetic deviation at 21°25′00″N 39°49′00″E happens to be 2.6 degrees. Here's a nice map if you want to have a look yourself.

But what's science when you can wilfully ignore history.

He said the English had imposed GMT on the rest of the world by force when Britain was a big colonial power, and it was about time that changed.

Not really. We were a pretty important maritime power but not particularly colonial at the time and I think you'll find that the world adopted the zero meridian at Greenwich because the Brits just happened to be the first to discover a reliable method of working out longditude during sea voyages. Either way most people call it "UTC" from the French for "Universal Co-ordinated Time" now.

I think it's high time we put to bed this myth of the muslim world being great scientists who discovered astronomy, chemistry and the like. They didn't. At best they managed to preserve Greek learning and just plundered the rest from places like India.

And as to adopting Mecca Standard Time, when you lot can present me with a Geologists that is acually capable of passing a GCSE science exam then I will listen to you, and will still tell you to fuck off.

The ArchDhimmi of Canterbury

If you heard a lot of screaming coming from the fenlands of East Anglia yesterday it was probably from people being scalded to death because I read this and it rather made my piss boil.

The Archbishop of Canterbury says the adoption of certain aspects of Sharia law in the UK "seems unavoidable".

The stupid fucking cunt really doesn't get this one little bit. I mean I hold no brief for the Anglican Medaeval Unreality Cult but does this fucktard actually know what his job is? Here's a hint Dr Williams. You're and ARCHBISHOP, not a fucking imam, that means you worship the chap who got nailed to a plank, not the chap who fucked a 12 year old girl called Aalyah. It should mean that in the culture war we have had thrust upon us you should be on our side, not theirs.

Dr Rowan Williams told Radio 4's World at One that the UK has to "face up to the fact" that some of its citizens do not relate to the British legal system.

Well boo fucking hoo. Hey there are goodly chunks of the British legal system I don't especially like but it's the one we have. Look if you don't "relate" to it that much may I suggest you piss off to some third world cesspit where they have a system of amputation and stoning that is more suited to your neanderthal sensibilities?

Dr Williams argues that adopting parts of Islamic Sharia law would help maintain social cohesion.

Look you weirdybeary idiot, it will do no such thing. It will do the precise opposite. Rather than being dragged kicking and screaming into something approaching modernity the towelheads will just be even more ghettoised. And don't give me this shite about "oh it's just for civil disputes and both parties have to agree." What sodding chance does a woman in Islam have of standing up and saying "No, I'd rather this child custody case went before a proper court, you know one where we present evidence that is equal in weight to yours and I might actually stand a chance of winning my case."

He says Muslims should not have to choose between "the stark alternatives of cultural loyalty or state loyalty".

Bzzzzt! Wrong! That is exactly the choice that they have to make. Either you wish to embrace the legal and cultural norms of British society or you remain loyal to your barbarous religion and its dark-age practices. There is no accomodation. There is no compromise.

You take it or you fuck right the hell off.

And if you go, can you take the speccy cunt pictured below with you. He has a beard so he should fit right in.

Mohammed the teddy

There's a company on the net called "Bad Taste Bears" who sell, well, teddies that you might not want nine year old Sudanese children to take home to their mothers.

I reckon that they are missing a trick here and that with all the kerfuffle in the land that gave us the whackiest named militia ever that the market is most definitely ready for a Mohammed bear complete with turban, brood drenched scimitar and teacher's head. Hey why not have a range, you could have a Aalyah bear in a burqa or an Ali bear with a koranic verse green bandana on his head and wired up to a load of explosives.

That said I would be really curious to know just how much of my taxes went in foreign aid to Sudan last year¹ and given the outrage that is about to be perpetrated by the representatives of the "religion of peace" again just how much will go there next year.

Let me tell you the answer to the latter had better be fucking zero or else some politicos are going to get shoeing.


¹ £350,000,000 apparently. Fucking hell someone pass me a machine gun.

UPDATE: Mo the bear is up for sale on Ebay due to "a change in the school curriculum".

Pot / Kettle Chromatic Equivalence Alert

Hi, I'll do the dishes, I've brought my own teatowel.

Perhaps if you permitted a certain religion to be practiced in your country you might be familiar with Matthew 7:3,

And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?

Perhaps, my dishrag clad friend, rather than telling us off for not doing enough against terrorism, if you were to do something about your schoolbooks (for men only, natch) telling your kids that we in the west are irredeemable kuffir who should be destroyed, not to mention exporting said schoolbooks to "educational" institutions you set up around the world which leads your country to be a decided net exporter of islamic whackjob terrorists then you may have a point of view we might want to listen to.

Until then, fuck off you cunt.

"We shall have peace"

Oh this is fucking rich!

More than 130 Muslim scholars have written to Pope Benedict and other Christian leaders urging greater understanding between the two faiths. They say that world peace could depend on improved relations between Muslims and Christians.

Greater understanding my arse... we all know this means "you must understand us, we don't need to understand you". Thing is, as I pointed out in an earlier post, by taking a look at the Koran the Christians (whom as you know I hold no brief for) can perfectly well understand where they stand, and it isn't here...

They also cite the Koran as placing a duty on Muslims to treat Christians and Jews as followers of those prophets with particular friendship.

rather it's here...

5:54 O ye who believe! take not the Jews and the Christians for your friends and protectors: They are but friends and protectors to each other. And he amongst you that turns to them (for friendship) is of them. Verily God guideth not a people unjust.

and here

9:29 Fight against such of those who have been given the Scripture as believe not in Allah nor the last day, and forbid not that which Allah hath forbidden by His Messenger and follow not the religion of truth, until they pay the tribute (jizya) readily, being brought low.

Peace, apparently, depends on either conversion to Islam or subjugation and taxation as inferiors.

I am reminded of King Theoden's speech to Saruman when Saruman offers peace...


We shall have peace... We shall have peace, when you answer for the burning of the Westfold, and the children that lie dead there! We shall have peace, when the lives of the soldiers whose bodies were hewn even as they died against the gates of the Hornberg, are avenged! When you hang from a gibbet for the sport of your own crows...! We shall have peace.

Oining the Ragheads, encore.

Another day, another "offensive" cartoon, another predictable howling from our bearded brethren insisting that sharia law be implemented forthwith and the people reesponsible are "severely punished" for having the temerity to upset them.

What are the whining about now, this...



Fucking hell, I have a three year old relative who can do better than that! Jesus even me with my one fine art neuron could probably rustle up something more realistic. If they want to complain about anything it should be that the Nerikes Allehanda newspaper employs utterly crap artists.

Take the Stanstead Express, when your life is a mess

Well that was my week off done with. Dog didn't make it (boo!), friend came over (yay!) and I totally failed to do even a half of the things I had planned which is about normal for me taking time off.

Anyway today finds me on the lovely Stansted Express as I dropped my friend off at the airport this morning at very early o'clock and rather than drive the rest of the way in I took the fast train. All fine in the morning as it was me and some half asleep commuters we picked up at Bishop's Stortford but this evening's train is packed with people you expect to be going to an airport served by Ryanair, EasyJet and a host of other budget carriers. Actually kind of reminds me of my student days getting the boat train out to Harwich for the ferry (you never see student inter-railers on that boat any more, guess everyone goes by plane now).

However this would not be a Grumpy Dragon blog post without a nark so here it comes.

Lots of plod and pretend plod milling around on the platform for the train and stopping people. Fair enough, the ragheads are trying to kill us all again so we have a heightened sense of security.

However what do we know. We know that all the current bunch of people were middle eastern followers of the "Religion of Peace"; of this much we are certain.

So can you explain to me why the four people who were being stopped, searched and of course filling in the racial profiling form were:

* A white man in his 50's in a business suit.
* A young black woman with a baby in a pram
* A Caucasian student, eastern European by his accent
* A bag of salt and vinegar crisps.

OK so maybe not the last one, but certainly nobody who looked, you know, a bit, well, muslim.

Here's a tip. If you are ever stopped and they ask you what your race is, tell them to put "other". It fucks up their "see, see, we don't do racial profiling, honest" figures and if everyone stopped complying with this piece of NuLabour shite we might be able to free the plod up to stop and search those who, on the balance of the evidence, would be more likely to be wandering around carrying explosives and looking for a few dhimmis to personally introduce to Allah.

Arise, Honorary Dragon.

I wish it to be known that, by the powers vested in my green scaly tail, that Sir Salman Rushdie has today been granted the status of Honorary Dragon.

Sir Salman (do you run that name together, like Siralan?) in recognition of his dragony status, is granted the right to set fire to dipshits who richly deserve it and may I suggest that he join me in the immolation of Pakistan's religious affairs minister, Ejaz ul-Haq.

You see by me making Sirsalman a dragon I have inflamed muslim sensibilities and it would seem that the only response a muslim has to getting upset is to blow random motherfuckers up. Can't possibly be the bomber that's responsible, no; it was that nasty dhimmi dragon that provoked him by giving that man who said nasty things about the paedophile prophet¹ a pretty plaque to hang on his wall.

Well Mr Ul-Haq you're just going to have to get used to being upset because here's one little dragon who is just going to keep oining you and your tawdry, violent religion ("religion of peace" my arse). Maybe after we've granted gongs, knighthoods and the Sacred and Noble Order of the Wombat to every fucking apostate of Islam we can find you'll have all got yourselves worked up into such a tizzy that you'll forget what colour live and neutral are and blow yourselves up with the bomb you're making.

Weren't we looking for a new day for a bank holiday just recently? What was Crusader Richard the Lionheart's birthday?


¹ One of his wives, Aisha I believe, was 11 when married and 13 when Mo first did the deed. Where I come from a man who has sex with a 13 year old is called a paedophile. Case closed.


UPDATE: Apparently he's the son of the late General Zia Ul-Haq, former military dictator of Pakistan. Now (this is true) my uncle, Derek Draco, met General Zia several times in his capacity as an arms dealer (albeit one sponsored by the UK government) and so may well have met the young Ejaz.

Should have set fire to the little fucker whilst he had the chance.

Your tax dollars at work (in the service of Allah)

This is just so wrong on so many levels that I barely know where to start. Let's leave aside for the moment that there isn't and never can be "moderate" Islam¹ just what the flying fuck is my government doing using my fucking taxes to spread a religion, let alone the most reactionary, backward, evil religions mankind has ever farted out of his arse!

At a conference on Islam, Mr Blair also called for closer links between Islamic schools and mainstream state schools.

No, what you should be doing is making sure that there are no Islamic schools (or Jewish or Christian ones). Stick everyone together and take God(s) out of the equation and we might stand a fucking chance of not having a bunch of indoctrinated kids who will be trying to destroy anyone who doesn't mutilate their children's genitals in the correctly divinely prescribed method.

Mr Blair said British politicians must listen harder to the "calm voice of moderation and reason" of the majority of the country's Muslims.

Wrong again! What our spineless politicians should be saying to self appointed religious spokesmen of any stripe is "Fuck you. We're a secular country and if you think we're going to take your brand of dark-ages fairy tale into consideration when making policy then you are in for a motherfucking surprise."

"The voices of extremism are no more representative of Islam than the use in times gone by of torture to force conversion to Christianity represented the teachings of Christ."

Oh that's fucking rich. I think you'll find that the only people forcibly converting people to their religion now are the members of the "religion of peace". You might want to have a browse over at Dhimmi Watch, they usually post a new "No compulsion in religion" story from around the world two or three times a week.

The extra £1m was to go to British universities which teach Islamic studies courses - which were important to challenge extremism.

I don't suppose that we could have spent that extra million on universities that teach stuff like engineering or medicine, you know, things that aren't fairytales and are actually useful? No, guess that would be elitist and not the way we do things in bliars beutiful britian any more would it.

Dr Ataullah Siddiqui said teaching of Islam in English universities was based on "out-of-date and irrelevant issues".

Of course it is, you're teaching Islam you fuckwit. How much more out of date and irrelevant can you get!

Tony, when one of these Islamonutters whose been on one of your "moderate Islam" courses blows something up in a couple of years I trust that you will do the decent thing and throw yourself off a bridge in front of the relatives of the dead.








¹ Go and actually read the Koran and the Hadith if you don't believe me - you're either in the Dar al Islam or the "House of War" and if you're in the latter then you are an enemy of Islam, no ifs or buts.

Cough

The muslims are at it again and this time on my home turf. Mind you what I find really amusing (unlike this story (hat-tip to Frank Chalk) which had me spitting blood) is that this particular hijab wielding numpty does not even know what her own religion says on the subject of tobacco (hint - "nothing"). Take a wander around any major metropolitan centre in an islamic country and the blokes in the dishrag hats will be puffing away on the woodbines like it's going out of fashion. What with lack of ale, shagging and pretty much anything else that might possibly be fun there's precious little else left to do unless you have a fondness for camels.

And what about those nice fruity flavoured baccies that they make for the shisha pipes? I'm not even a smoker but during my sojurns in the middle east, Lebanon in particular, I rather enjoyed those with one of those minty teas they do - almost made up for the lack of decent beer and the Syrian army trying to shoot me (it's a long story - don't ask)

Mind you this could be a really good way for Tony's cronies to crack down on the binge drinking culture. Imagine the scene in a typical ghastly city centre pub on a friday night.

Chav: "Ere mate, give us three pints of snakebite and an absinthe and passion fruit alcopop for me bird"

Barman: "No kuffir I will not. Alcohol is haraam!"

[Exeunt with alarums and excursions and fisticuffs and the summoning of the rozzers]

Open wide and say "Allaaaaah"

I swear that they must say this sort of shit purely to wind up the kuffirs

The NHS should provide more faith-based care for Muslims, an expert says.

Muslims are about twice as likely to report poor health and disability than the general population, says Edinburgh University's Professor Aziz Sheikh.

Writing in the British Medical Journal, he called for male circumcision on the NHS and more details over alcohol derived drugs.

Look, just fuck off and die will you. Please explain to me why the bloody hell a single penny piece of my tax money should go to fund your idiotic, venial, child abusing rituals and dietary foibles. You work in the industry Mr Aziz Raghead - you know the state of our NHS or you should. My mum got carted from pillar to post because there wasn't any money to treat her condition within 100 miles of where she lived and died as a result, I ended up paying privately for Mrs Dracunculus' treatment for a very painful condition a couple of years ago because it was either that or wait for three months before she could even see a consultant let alone get any sort of treatment started and yet we should be catering to your particular evil version of Flying Spaghetti Monsterism?

OK so we have to give you prayer rooms at your GPs surgery, fund unnecessary elective surgery on your poor bloody offspring, pay for alternative treatments because at some point the drug you're prescribed might have been in contact with alcohol (hint for yo' ass man, I have never been in a lab where alcohol wasn't widely used so It's a fair bet that they all have!). So what do we cut to pay for this - remember you haven't got that caliphate you're after so you cannot put your jizya tax on the dhimmis just yet. Do we put old Mrs Miggins' hip operation back a few months, cut back the A&E department (so long as it's not in a muslim area)?

Also I wonder if you would be supportive of, say, Pagans demanding that GPs' surgeries offer healing rituals on the NHS and that every surgery must employ one full time Wiccan priestess to minister to the needs of the Pagan community? Or that it be obligatory for ambulance crews to leave orthodox jews at the side of the road following a road accident if it happens on the sabbath (actually you'd probably be supportive of that last one!)

Look you dickwad, you and all your co-religionists are human, same as me¹. Penicillin works the same on you as me. If the service offered by a GP is good enough for me then it's fucking good enough for you and we should not, no MUST NOT pander to your or anyone else's religion.

By all means follow your evil little antediluvian religion in the privacy of your own home but do not for a nanosecond presume that everyone else has to pander to its diktats. Now crawl back under your rock before you discover just quite how al-harb the dar al-harb can be.


¹ Acually given the fact that I'm really a dragon and just happen to be disguised as a human this is a pretty poor analogy. However penicillin does work on dragons, we take if for strep throat all the time.

Just a slogan

Right, so they were just slogans were they. Bloody hell my wierdybeardy friend you have just got to get yourself a new defence lawyer because that has got to be the crappiest plea in Christendom*

Anyway you twat, should you not be standing up for your religion and denouncing the court for having the temerity to even consider bringing a holy warrior such as yourself before the beak and yelling that we infidel will all burn in hell once Osama Bin Liner has got around to blowing us all up? Nah, you're a like little pissant scoolboy looking all shamefaced down at his shoes and mumbling "sorry sir" after he's been caught because you're now looking at six of the best (or two years in chokey in your case - personally I think we should take a leaf out of the Bumper Fun Book of Sharia Law and chop something off... I would suggest we start with his dick but he obviously doesn't have one).

You, sir, are a craven coward, your religion stinks like a week old fish and your prophet was a paedophile.

I don't mean that of course, it's just a slogan.




* Whilst it still exists.